Contact Post | Caliban

[clayking]

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[guylining]

i don't want you to vanish before you know

i don't want you to vanish at all

but any of us could. nick did.

two nicks. anna. magnus. cy and crais.

so if you do, then i want you to know, i don't want to have regrets. and it's true, anyway. it's been true for a while.

[clayking]

It's a shame that I cannot make a promise not to be...gone from this world. As I have already been taken before.

There are no guarantees in this world or the next- but I am glad I've heard or at least read, those words. And I do hope you never have any regrets when it comes to my thoughts of me.

Oh? Has it? The cocky part of me wants to ask if it was since I licked the blood off your chest. Though those things can rarely be boiled down to a moment.

It's true for me- as well. The way your magic danced with mine..Well you left an impression.

[guylining]

i have one regret

that i didn't open up to you sooner. that i was closed off and untrusting for no good reason

but i won't have more.
it could've been when you licked the tears from my face
or when you burned your fire into me
or when you tasted my blood. all of it
it all just built

but i liked that too. when our magic connected. you're not alone in that.

[clayking]

You had Nick Scratch's words in your head. I could hardly blame you for such a thing as that.

And I am a demon after all. Trusting us is always something of a risk.

If I linger on those memories too much- I might have quite the issue to deal with.
But you did see that darkness I hold inside me. All those urges to see you hurt and whimper- to cry and beg. To hold such pain in my hands like that.

And you still say you love me. That's quite the feat.

[guylining]

caliban you've taken me to the edge of what i could tolerate and no further
you've held my life in your hands more than once and you've kept it safe

knowing all of that. how could i not love you?

[clayking]

Well when you put it like that- it rather makes sense.

I suppose I'm still getting rather used to the idea of mortals loving me.

[guylining]

it seems to have happened quite a lot here.
is it really so surprising?

[clayking]

Perhaps I am that charming.
At times, both Magnus and Sabrina had celestial blood, their attraction made a little more sense.

Everything else is...new. And I like to pretend I'm above lofty mortal desires most of the time.

[guylining]

as if you don't love it when poor, insignificant mortals like me worship at your feet

[clayking]

Well now- I can't deny that- can I? Even if you aren't insignificant by any means.

Though playing to my ego does always win an argument.

[guylining]

i like your kingly ego

plus you have this way of making me feel wanted literally all the time, i really like that too

[clayking]

You do seem to have a thing for arrogance.

I imagine that is because I want you all the time- sitting on my lap or spread under me, eyes full of tears, and my name on your lips. Or just pressed against me-

So you are wanted. Very much.

[guylining]

i want you too

you know exactly what i like, like you can tap into that part of me that just needs

i don't know
to lose control
and i love letting you, but i love when you make me. and i love how you hurt me and that you like it

[clayking]

Well, I am a demon, and being that sadistic is rather encoded into me. And it's certainly a part of me I don't get to explore and you're just...

breath-taking when I have you like that. Well, you're always hard to forget when you walk into a room but..

Dripping in blood and whining for me? Kinda favorite.

I still dislike you being hurt by any hand but mine. Those last few weeks have certainly proven that.

[guylining]

that place

it took me back. ineroth's torture was less sort of. modern, i suppose, like there wasn't bright lights and noise
but it was pain that just never felt like it'd have an end, like. it was inside my bones
those shadow tendrils

that place wasn't the same but it brought me back to that moment
i thought, nothing they can do to me would be as bad as that. it doesn't matter
i almost preferred it when they hurt me, because then i was resisting
you know?
then i wasn't giving them what they wanted
and whatever they do i can tolerate it because i've lived through worse

i wanted to just come home and feel normal again but i cant
i was bonded to nick so now i just feel this void where he was
i think i'd prefer the torture
even theirs. if it meant he could come back.

[clayking]

...Can I do anything? To help- I mean, about Nick. I could torture you evidently or...we could talk.

You could come here. Nick's loss...I was fond of him, very fond but it wasn't anything close to sharing what you had with him.

I'm not particularly good at knowing what people need when it comes to such a...sting as a loss. I barely handle my own well let alone others.

But if you tell me what you need- I will let the universe burn out in my attempt to give it to you. So...

What do you need?

[guylining]

honestly torture helps
pain helps, i just can't think about anything but the pain then
like it helped me even before i went to hell, but. since then, even more so

but being with people i trust and love helps too
so honestly just being with you would help

that's what i need

[clayking]

Shall I come over then?

I can...distract you in any way you wish.

I'll happily be what you need.

[guylining]

i'm not trying to take you away from john after everything we've just gone through

but
if you have time
then yes please come over caliban

[clayking]

I've time with John- we're reconnecting but it doesn't mean I cannot make time for you.

Give me a few moments.

[ And true to his words- there was that familiar little spark of hellfire in the center of Nate's place before it sparks up into a tunnel of flame before it fades back down and away, leaving Caliban standing there in his usual open long-sleeved black shirt and black pants- his blond hair tied up into a short pony tail as he glances around the room.]

You know if you need me, you should never fear asking for my time- my love.

Cw: drug use

[guylining]

[ Nate's wearing an old t-shirt and a pair of ripped black jeans, nothing fancy or out of the ordinary. His piercings are back in place. So is the telltale bloodshot quality to his eyes, which they haven't had since before he entered that long sleep. He doesn't smoke often anymore, but if there's any time to do it, it's when he's dealing with grief.

He goes to Caliban right away, reaching up to trail his hands over his jaw. ]

I just know all of this was hard for him, he told me he left.

But I do...I want you.

[ His hands drop to Caliban's waist and then slide around it. ]

I have, um. Alcohol and, other things, if you like.

[clayking]

[ He notices that glazed-over effect the other eyes have but it wasn't worth commenting when it came to the demon. After all, it wasn't like he was the type to judge such a thing, even more so someone was dealing with the city dragging someone home.

The demon's arm smooths down Nate's back- grateful for the chance to touch the other without the guards yelling at them the moment they even got close. His head tilted slightly into the other hand. ]

It was. It is. He came home. He's at home. So. [ Caliban was doing his best to make that better.]

Well, I'm here. And I want to be here.

[ And he was happy to play the distraction for the night. To let the other focus on him rather than Nick. His head lowers to simply brush those lips against Nate's before he spoke again.]

Hm? Looking to share a joint? And let me have my wicked way with you?

[guylining]

[ Nate's body all but melts against Caliban. His shoulders relax, letting go of tension that he was barely aware of holding.

It's not just that Nick's gone, and he's craving the people he loves most. It's also that they couldn't do this when they were trapped together, not without being pulled apart and beaten. Here, in Nate's house, they're safe and free to touch again. He's free to tilt his head up and lean into that kiss, free to flick his tongue along the demon's lips, free to breathe in his scent and know they won't be interrupted. ]

I'd like that. I love it when you're wicked.

[ He pauses then, and leans close. He'd said in in text, but... ]

I love you. [ It's whispered, a breath on his lips while his eyes meet the demon's. ] I love you, Caliban.

[clayking]

[ Caliban's hands are firm on the other hip as he tries to ground the other in the moment with him, if only to get those lingering effects of their respective captivity. He smiles against that kiss and easily returns it- sinking against those lips for a few moments as his fingers press just a little harder against the others hips.]

You certainly seem to when you're all ruined and pretty...

[ He teased lightly before Nate said that words and the conversation shifted-the weight of them seemed way more real when said in person. Perhaps it was just the months of dancing around them- of making sure there was some distance even if they never spoke about it.

The demon swallowed- even if he didn't need it before he reached a hand up to cup the other's neck as he kept his eyes on the others. His tongue brushed along his lower lip for a moment before he said those words back. ]

I love you too, Nate.

[guylining]

[ Nate's hands come up to his neck, and gently brush upwards over his jaw. He looks Caliban in the eyes, and doesn't doubt a word the demon's saying. He thinks he's known for a while. He thinks both of them have, only now they're admitting it.

It should be admitted. All they do by not saying it is to court regrets, later, if they're separated.

When they're separated. ]

I know.

[ He leans in close, pressing against Caliban, before stretching up to kiss his lips. ]

You deserve to know. Right now, I'm yours. Okay?